Weakening the Desire
There is a reason why I pushed myself to go back to running after my surgery besides controlling my weight. Running has been my passion; it has been something good in my life, something I want to keep.
When we starve a passion, it weakens.
It was easy in the first weeks post surgery to concentrate on how bad it felt to run. And I did, sometimes feeling sorry for myself fits the mood. It was easy during those days to remember the bad, the pain of the last or all 26 miles of a marathon, to remember the bad long runs and the bad short races. It was easy to forget the benefits that passion has given me.
It was easy to forget how much good this passion has added to my life, how it has changed my body, how it has helped my mind. It was easy to forget when it helped me in my difficult days.
Yes, in those bad moments it is so easy to forget the good.
I had to insist, I had to keep at it and I had to allow myself to remember the good, and to allow myself to feel the good again. Sometimes, that is all it takes.
Any feeling, any desire, any passion, no matter how strong is weaken when starved. Running will not be one.