I write about my life and life itself seen through my eyes for who can write through the experiences of others if not their own?

Saturday, February 13, 2010

Say What You Need to Say

Years ago, still in my teens, my mother handed me a bundle of loose leaf paper. It contained dozens of poems she had read in her own teen years. I never memorized but a couple of them, all as romantic as I hoped they’d be. I’m not sure I’d know where they are now.

Occasionally one or another flashes through my mind, sometimes in fragments only because I can't remember them in their entirely. Today, I thought of one of the poems she had given me written by the Spanish poet, Gustavo Adolfo Bécquer,

in her eyes a tear appeared,
And a word of forgiveness on my lips.
Pride spoke, and wiped away her tears,
While the word on my lips expired.
Today I go my way, and she goes another;
But when I think of our mutual love,
I still say: why was I silent that day?
And she will say: why did I cry not?

Beautiful way of expressing such a human experience; Becquer speaks of the result of not saying what you want to say when you want to say it.

It is not the rhetorical “tell people you love them because you might not wake up tomorrow”; rather it is say what you feel today because you feel it without waiting for it to be different tomorrow.

Often we are willing to put forward a stream of anxiety or fits of anger between periods of seeming indifference but we shy at the thought of expressing warm feelings afraid of the rejection that might be forthcoming.

Although warm words can not always melt a wall of ice, their objective should not be it. Their purpose should be nothing more than to say what you want to say because you feel it and want to share it.

Or we might end up spending our life saying: “why was I silent that day?”

When there is nothing left to say, let that be because all has been said.