I write about my life and life itself seen through my eyes for who can write through the experiences of others if not their own?

Tuesday, December 09, 2008

The Season to be Jolly

I love Christmas season lights. I love to see houses at night lit up with tiny bulbs. But there is something melancholic about Christmas. Not sure what.

Last Christmas I felt lost in the season. Wherever I was at the time, I felt out of it. I went through the season in a mechanical way, buying the gifts that I needed to buy, sharing the times I needed to share with the family. I got through it.

Maybe it is because life changes as time goes on. My children are grown. Our focus in life changes. Our priorities and our goals change. And we must change.

Maybe I never paid attention to the season before and didn't realize that this is how it always feels. The lights are beautiful, the tree is big, and the Christmas season is here. But there is melancholy this year too.

Maybe it has always been part of my season and I simply never stopped to look at it. Perhaps it is more than a time to be jolly, it is a time to reflect on what I've done, where I am and where I'm going.

It is a time to be glad for what I have and what I've had. To let go, to move on. To look forward.

To be jolly.