I write about my life and life itself seen through my eyes for who can write through the experiences of others if not their own?

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

We All Lose

There are things that baffle me more than others. On those things that baffle me I cycle them in my head trying to find a reason for them to happen. I can’t.

Abuse is one of them, any form of abuse. Actions that hurt others and that appear to give the abuser satisfaction.

Watching the story of the 4 boys that were rescued 6 years ago from their adoptive parents who systematically starved them to the point that their growth was stunted, and learning that the parents had other kids who were treated humanly and cared for, one wonders what possesses one person to single out another human being to abuse.

We hear heart breaking stories of families where one child is chained to a closet, forced to do their bodily functions in the same place where they must sleep, while the other siblings are out playing. Why single one out? Why hurt one at all???

That kind of abuse, any form of abuse to children is pure evil and can not be explained, not to me, my mind can not comprehend it.

But on less severe and more common cases than the abuse of children, what makes a person be callous to one, and not the others? And what satisfaction is found in hitting the target?

In those “more common” cases, it is said that the person being treated unkindly triggers some old baggage within the psychology of the other person. When subconsciously the trigger awakens buried emotions, the response can be aggression at the person who is unaware of the anger directed at them.

That theory makes sense to me and it is the only way that I can somewhat understand meanness directed at one and not others. I am sure there are zillion other theories. None that convince me.

What it does not explain is how this behavior can go on seemingly unnoticed and not become at some point conscious enough for the person to be aware of their actions and what those actions are doing to others, but that is too complicated for me to attempt to decipher it. I can only guess that it might be the satisfaction derived from achieving their goal that keeps them engaged.

I cycle these things in my head at times trying to understand them better. I can’t. Whatever it is, it hurts all. There are no winners.