I write about my life and life itself seen through my eyes for who can write through the experiences of others if not their own?

Monday, April 29, 2013

What Doesn’t Kill You Make You Stronger.
That is one of those phrases that really get under my skin because I don’t believe in it.  
Does something intended to kill you really make you stronger?
When you are kicked and beat, but not dead, are you really stronger or just more experienced in pain and mistreatment and maybe even more afraid and more bitter than before?
Yes, I understand there are times when whatever mishaps survived yield some benefits in our perspective.  I look at certain things in a different way now than I did 10 years ago and that is a direct result of what I went through. I, however, wish that the same growth could have been achieved in a different way without the turmoil that came with it, without the anguish and chaos. I wish I had not grown “stronger” in such a way.  Should I wish then the same on everybody so they can be just as strong? I don’t think so.
I would not wish it on anyone.
Not only because it is unthinkable to wish that on someone else, but because I fail to see the benefits.
You survive what you survive – illness, pain, abuse, then you move on and try to find something good in what just happened because otherwise you’ll spend the rest of your life mourning over your misfortune which I also refuse to do.
It does not make you stronger.  Somehow you survive it, get over it, go on with your life and can look back and say “damn, I can’t believe I made it”.
Am I better because of…whatever? No, I don’t think so. I think I would have found an awareness at some point; maybe the event precipitated it in me, but I also believe that if a person is not open to change, change never happens.

I call it awareness.

Awareness will make you stronger. No need for the pain and chaotic experience.
And if you do have the chaotic experience, does it really make you stronger?

Does it really?